Category: Random Thoughts

What is insecurity and why do most people suffer with it in one form or another? Insecurity is usually caused by the lack of acceptance by our peers or the lack of confidence in our own selves. When we are not accepted by our peers we tend to see ourselves as dysfunctional or inferior in one way or another. We tend to value the opinions of others over our own. We allow the opinions of others to control our own self perception and that can create a very negative self image. Though other peoples opinions will always play a part in our lives we must realize that they are opinions not facts. I have watched so many good people be held down or back from their full potential by the opinions and actions of others. Being popular or accepted may have its emotional and social rewards but the popularity can and most of the time usually is short lived.

  One should not look outward for acceptance and validation , you should look inward for if you do not accept and embrace who you are then you will never become the person that you truly can be. Each one of us has the potential for greatness within us and each of us has our unique qualities that makes us grand. Some of us have exterior beauty as a gift but that fades with time and age, but all of us have a unique inner quality that will remain with us till our time to leave this world. I guess we all strive for physical appearance and social ranking because we live in a time where everything is so temporary and disposable. We get bombarded with images of how we should look and how our life should be in the many forms of visual media available in this modern age that it makes us feel inferior or lacking in one way or another. Most of the people we see in visual media have been altered by make up, soft filters on the cameras and air brushing on the photo images. This gives the illusion of perfection and beauty that very rarely exists if at all in nature.

There is also the victim mentality that seems to be a mainstream theme in modern society, So many people feel they have been a victim in one way or another in their life. Not saying we haven’t been victimized but to hold on to the mentality of being a victim only keeps one from moving on and living life. Why waste the time we have here on earth worrying about what has happened when we could be celebrating what is now and is yet to come. Fear is another factor that seems to be a road block to happiness if it is held on to and allowed to be a daily occurrence. Fear has its place but is meant to be short lived, when we allow it to stay for too long it grows and takes control of our daily life. Living in constant fear keeps us from enjoying life the way we are meant to. As one of our presidents said the only thing we have to fear is fear itself and he was 100% right. I always like the line from the movie Dune that was Fear is the mind killer and if you really think about it that is true. Fear seems to consume ones every waking moment and thought when it is present. It makes us only focus on that which caused the fear and keeps us from thinking of the greater things in life.

Well enough of my babbling for today
Peace
R. Barbier

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   Do we limit our own selves? Is one of the main reasons we do not succeed and can not be happy the fact we don’t allow our selves to do so? I always wondered if this is a fact or just another random thought we all get that helps fuel our guilt complexes. I do believe in some cases we do set our own boundaries and limit ourselves in order to keep within our comfort zone. Some people do not like change and rather stay in a unhappy but yet comfortable life then to risk it getting worse or taking on new challenges they fear they will be unable to handle.

When we are children we set our limits and goals by the standards and expectations of both our peers and our family. We take the opinions of those around us and give them the power of authority because when we are children we take everything at face value and as true. By the time we start realizing not everything we see and hear is always true we already have set up a behavior pattern and set many of the boundaries or limits we will live by for the rest of our lives. Though some may and can change by influential experiences and by the influence of others basically they will not change much.

  Alas there is always hope because the human brain is reprogrammable and so is the limits and boundaries we have set or accepted. To change both your limits and boundaries is not an easy task because you have to basically ignore the programming long enough to set new boundaries and limits. It is kind of like a bad habit you’ve been doing for years, though difficult to break the habit it is not impossible. Look at people who smoked for over 20 to 30 years and quit. They had to not only break the habit of wanting to put a cigarette in their mouth but the addiction of nicotine. Many have succeeded in quitting smoking and so many have also failed. This shows how difficult it may be to face a habit and addiction but it also shows you can beat both if you are determined enough.

  Most of our negative thoughts and the boundaries / limits we have are basically habitual behaviors that can be overcome through time and determination.  We have to want to change our limits and boundaries in order to succeed, just like one must really want to quit smoking in order to do so. We also must realize we can achieve much more than we presently believe we can and see that we are only limited by our own thoughts and beliefs. This makes me remember a line from a song I had to sing back in a elementary choir “Nothing is impossible until you try” it was from a Thomas Edison themed school function.

  Allot of the times when I feel that I can not do more or better I look at all those in the history of mankind who overcame great odds to achieve wondrous things. People like the early colonial Americans who challenged one of the greatest military powers of the time to achieve freedom and the creation of both the constitution and the great nation of the United States.  So many historical examples of men and women who broke through their limits and boundaries to challenge the odds and win. They are proof that anything is possible if you allow yourself to be limitless and break through the boundaries set by society, peers and your own self.

  Get out of your comfort zone and discard those limits and boundaries that keep you from being all you can and should be. Be  who you want to be and beyond, bring the uniqueness of your individuality to the table of life and be proud of who and what you are. Let no one tell you you are anything but great and wonderful for we all are a par of a wonderful and extraordinary species called the human race.

Well enough of my ramblings for now
Peace and Love to you all
Ray Barbier

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   Sometimes I just sit here and think of all the friends I have known through out my life and wonder where all of they are and how they are doing now. All those friends from my childhood and teen years that I moved away from back in the late 80’s those that I hung out with after school and those that were just a school acquaintances. I wonder if any of them ever think about me if even remember me. It is very interesting how we form friendships and alliances during our youth and how easy the friendships and alliances disappear through both the progression of time and the increasing of the distance of space between. Then there are a few friendships that seem to never be effected by the test of time. I also find it funny how our memories can be distorted by time and even fade into fuzzy recollections as we age.

   Looking older is never been much an issue for me but the one thing that does bother me about growing older is the loss of the friendships I had and the slow increase in loneliness i feel due to the lack of friends. I miss having the group of friends I hung out with at times and I feel as if my world is shrinking day by day. So many friends I had have died or were lost to time and distance. I guess humans are generally social creatures and as we get older the social aspect of being human becomes less and less as we go through life. I have a few friends left from my childhood and teen years but they are far away and busy with their own lives as much as I am so we communicate less than I would like us to. This is mostly my fault due to my busy schedule so I enjoy the time I have to communicate when I can.

  Sometimes I sit here and remember the days when I and my friends had so much fun and faced the challenges of growing up together. I hope all of them are doing well and hope to see all of them at least one more time in this short life we all live. I wish them all well and that they have a great life along with happiness in their life and the lives of their loved ones.

May Peace and Understanding Guide you All Though your Lives.

Ray Barbier

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   Now that our economy is like a roller coaster and our weather is not as stable as it once was and our food supplies are tainted with bacteria more and more each day,We may need to start considering local farming to create more local food sources. Local farming would be more cost effective in the since of fuel due to less distance to ship the product and probably would have less problems with bacteria infection sense the local farmers would be eating what they sell and local government could inspect the farm as well. Another benefit to local food sources is the fact if a national catastrophe were to happen it would insure that people could at least eat. Since our acceptance of commercial farming we may have enjoyed a larger variety of produce and at a lower price but at the cost of both our safety and the quality of the product. Though the variety would be limited by geographic location the quality and safety of the food would be equal if not better and the cost would be lower due to the savings on shipping. 

  I know that the chances of local farming becoming a reality again in modern times is slim at best but maybe home based vegetable gardens could once again become a reality across America. Our grandparents had the right idea about being more self reliant and less wasteful with their resources. They grew and raised most of their food and did their own home repair and maintenance.

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Self forgiveness is something that very few of us ever practice, forgiving one’s self seems to be a much harder task than to forgive others. Why does it seem that to forgive some one is much easier than to forgive our own mistakes and transgressions?  For some reason we tend to be much harder on ourselves than we are on other people. We must realize that like everyone else we are not perfect and therefore we will make mistakes and should learn from those mistakes but not allow those mistakes to control our lives.  We can focus on our positive attributes and our achievements instead of on our mistakes and our negative aspects.  Mistakes being a part of the natural learning process that we all go through and they are beneficial in learning what we should not do.  So making mistakes is something that we all must face in this life that we live.

  Guilt which is an aftereffect of making a mistake is suppose to be a short lived emotion to help us remember that we had made that mistake.  Guilt is not supposed to be a lifelong emotion and if it becomes one it changes from a beneficial emotion into a destructive emotion.  Suffering Guilt for a long period of time is devastating to a persons self-esteem and their personal happiness. Accept the mistakes that you have made, then learn from them and try not to repeat them is about all one can do. Everybody makes mistakes and everyone faces guilt from time to time and that my friend is what being human is all about.

Well till next time

Peace R. Barbier

   Anger serves a purpose but is meant to be a temporary state of emotion not a way of life. Anger is designed for the purpose of self preservation and defense , It is a response to a negative force we encounter and usually turns off after the event. Sometimes anger will linger and cause great physical distress which is not its true design. Instead of anger we are supposed to have a memory of the incident and the mistrust or caution mentality. To hold on to anger for too long of time it creates a negative effect on your social and physical well being. To allow any emotion to be in control of you and your daily life is unhealthy. Emotions should be under your control not the other way around. Taming emotions that have gone wild and has gained control of your life is not an easy task. But like any challenge we face in life it is possible with determination and allot of self control. Though meditation, hypnosis and plain common sense one can regain control over their emotions within time. The first step is to realize that your emotions are in control of you and that you need to regain control of them.

  Some people choose to ignore or try and shut off their emotions and this also creates problems for your body and mind. Learn to experience your emotions when they come and then learn to let go of them once they are no longer necessary. Mankind has always had to deal with their emotions and how they can both be beneficial and devastating to the individual who experiences them. Too much emotions is bad just as too little of emotions is also bad. Find a balance between both extremes and learn to be the master of them and all will be well. When a emotion becomes too strong and uncontrollable find a way to express that emotion and to get it out of you. Writing, exercise, and any form of artistic expression usually are good ways to express and release the emotions you are dealing with. There are many other ways to deal with the overbearing emotions one can experience and each person needs to find the best way for them.

Depression is one of the most devastating emotions one must face and when facing it I would suggest not doing it alone, Talk to your family and friends about your sadness and ask them for help and if it is a very severe case do not feel ashamed to go ask for help from your physician or a therapist. Being depressed may be natural from time to time but it is not normal to be depressed all of the time.

Well enough rambling for today.

Peace.

R. Barbier

  There is no such thing as a perfect relationship, parent, child or lover and holding on to that belief only keeps someone from enjoying life and those who are in it. If we would learn to accept the fact the person we love and care about is human and will have many flaws we might be happier in our relationships. We can not expect anyone to adhere to the standards of perfection we have in our mind. Each person has both great qualities and potential as well as a bad side to their personality. We all suffer from a bad side and there is not one person here on earth who is perfect. We all should show respect to others and have self respect as well. Respect for each other is a very important part of any relationship, without respect a relationship will fall apart eventually.

Respect yourself and all others and love without condition along with understanding. Try to see things through the eyes of others and realize that sometimes there is more there than meets the eye. Never expect perfection from yourself or others. This is not to say you cant have high standards for yourself and others but be realistic in the standards you set. If you set the bar too high then you or they will never reach the goal or standard. Also remember relationships are a partnership so you must work together to make the relationship work and to improve its quality.

 

“Love yourself and others for who and what they are”

R. Barbier

   What if 2010 was the end of mankind’s time on earth? What if it becomes the extinction of all life on earth and everything we have achieved is washed away in the blink of an eye? It would be a shame to see all the accomplishments of man to be lost and forgotten. Man as a species has had many wonderful achievements and have done both some very remarkable acts as well as some that were quite horrifying. We have cured and managed many diseases , sent men to the moon along with created the atom bomb.

Though mankind has just begun learning the lessons of life we are coming closer to the end of our time here on earth. The solar cycles of the sun and the natural cycles of the earth compounded with the greenhouse gases mankind has contributed through industry and deforestation the planet we live on is growing hotter and more hostile. If we were able to determine an exact date for the end of mankind or the end of an inhabitable earth, would that change or influence mankind? Would we change our way of life to avoid or to extend our time here on earth?

Eventually earth will become inhabitable for all life, volcanic activity and the shifting of the earths plates will influence the earths weather and atmosphere to the point that mass extinction will take place. Even if we are lucky enough to escape or survive such changes there is both the threat of a mass solar event and  the near earth objects that will one day collide with earth and kill off the majority of life. So what is mankind to do to survive beyond the disasters awaiting us in our future? The only possibility for the survival of mankind is to make our first and foremost priority the colonization of space.

Unfortunately world governments see national security and military dominance more important than the wellbeing and survival of the human race. Seems to me that most government officials are too disconnected from the people they are meant to serve. This is how it has been since the creation of countries and nations. The Ruling class has always enjoyed life at the expense of the working class and it probably will remain this way till the end of time. Who knows, we may have thousands of years left before something happens that kills of the human race. We might even become advanced enough to prevent the  destruction of earth and to colonize the planets in deep space. One can always dream and have hope that mankind will find a way to survive.

Enough Ranting for now
Peace. R. Barbier