Tag Archives: Self Acceptance

Random thoughts 2-24-2017

IMG_0097bOne Voice, That is what each and every one of us has in the sea of voices in our world. One lifetime is all the time we have to shine and impact the world we live in. There are many who try to drown out the voices of others and some that will do anything to keep you from letting your voice be heard. DO not allow this to happen for your voice may be one of an infinite amount within the symphony of life, but it is as important as any other persons voice.  Behind your voice is the unique mind and soul that only one person possess, which is you. 

For in this world the best way to enact change is to change the hearts of the people around you. Inspire others to do better and achieve greater things within their lifetime.  You do not have to be a politician or well known personality to change the hearts of the people in the world, you only have to be yourself and teach others through example. Live what you believe, inspire others to do the same and except that each of us will have different ideas and paths to walk. Enlighten and be enlightened for no man or woman is ever done learning and growing , for there is always more to learn and experience.

Go and be yourself in this world, shine for who god lead you to be and love one another with no conditions.

Raymond Barbier 

Thought of the Day 2/7/2014

016Turn and look into the mirror, see yourself for who and what you are. Stop being who and what others expect you to be and be who you really are. Leave the masquerade and join in on the reality of who you were destined to truly be.

Ray Barbier

Who and what we truly are

002Why do we allow the opinions of others to effect our self-image, emotions and outlook on life. We tend to seek acceptance and reassurance from others, we learned this behavior as children. We need to see that though opinions of others have meaning and some weight, that our own opinions are just as important if not more so when it comes to our self. Others do not know you as you know yourself and they usually judge you on preconceived notions based on just one if not a few encounters they had with you. They don’t know your heart or mind, they have little fact or evidence to support their impression of your personality.

Even those that have known you for years still may not truly know who you are truly. Sometimes we do not even know ourselves as good as we should. We tend to be like a chameleon and change with the crowd and circumstances around us to blend in. We try to blend in and we rarely show our true selves out of fear of not being accepted or loved. The problem with being a chameleon or being a person who tries to fit in by putting on a mask is that we are never accepted or loved for who we are. Thus we are not accepted or loved at all, for they love the part we play not for who and what we are.

We try to kid ourselves they love us and accept us even though they see a disguise not our true image. But deep inside we will know is all a lie and falsehood. So it is far better to be loved and accepted by a few as who and what we truly are then to be loved and accepted by many for who we are not.

Be yourself, Believe in yourself and Be true to yourself. Worry not of the opinions of others and love yourself for who you are.

Ray Barbier

Control your path in life

022There are those whom seek out love, acceptance and security in others, this is not a bad thing unless it is the only place you seek and find them. Some people can not find love, acceptance or security within their own being, this seems to create a very bad behavior pattern. They float from one lover to another seeking out what they think will fill the void within themselves. The void is the absence of Self acceptance, self-love and self security, even though we can temporarily fill the void with the love of a lover but it quickly disappears. It takes the love within ourselves to compliment and maintain love between ourselves and another, more or less you can not love someone else fully and completely until you learn to love yourself unconditionally.

We tend to over complicate our lives when it can be so simple and direct, Love thyself in order to love others, have compassion and forgiveness for yourself so that you can do the same for others as well. Shrink that overgrown ego to its natural and original size, for a big and boasting ego is but a mask to hide the insecure being within. Lift your self-image up to where it belongs, for you are as great and as small as any other person in this world. Take the wheel and stop letting circumstances, influences and other people control your path in life. Learn the difference between relying on others and using them as a crutch or a shield.Give and worry not about what you will get in return. Learn to balance the needs and wants of the self with the needs and wants of others. Wake up and live your life and stop walking through it in that semi sedated state in which many of us live in.

I am but a fool who seeks to understand and I find being right is far less important than knowing and finding the truth and It is the journey I see as the prize, not the destination.

Ray Barbier

Change, acceptance and fear

003 Since the time we are born we sought out the approval of our family and peers, the path of life we choose to follow is heavily influenced by the opinions and attitudes of our family unit and our peers at school or work. Even though we are solitary beings in thought we tend to become attached to the ideals and values of those we are closest to. Of course we have our own personal spin on those values and ideas but the core of them were taken from the close circle of influence we have.  Good thing about human beings is they can change their core beliefs mid stream and change their direction if not their whole life path. Usually the older we get the less we look to others for approval and or acceptance and learn to be more independent in our views. Still the base core of the beliefs we had in our youth influences our lives. The dependence on the acceptance of a social group and or their approval can limit us from reaching our full potential . We wind up spending too much energy trying to make everyone around us happy as well as trying to gain their acceptance. A lot of us waste too much time trying to figure out why we are not accepted, liked or successful. We tend to believe  since we are not liked or accepted that we are either broken or something must be wrong with us. There is nothing wrong or broken within us, and usually we are more accepted and liked than we tend to perceive. Our fear and negative thoughts are blinding us to the truth that everyone is imperfect and that each one of us are both accepted and rejected by the world around us. Even the most popular people in society have those who dislike them and don’t accept them into their social groups.

I believe that we all must learn not to put so much time and energy into being accepted or liked and focus more on being the best person we can be. No matter what cards fate has dealt you in life you have the potential to be happy as well as the ability to change the things in your life that you don’t like.  Change of course is not an easy thing because the first thing you have to do is change your own mindset, you have to let go of the thoughts that make you believe your stuck or unable to progress beyond your current position in life. That is one of the hardest demons to wrestle with and usually it will not surrender easily. Once that is out of your way you just have to take the first step towards your new life. You will face obstacles and even have some set backs but you will make it to the destination if you keep determined. Self growth and self-improvement is a personal experience and there is no one out there other than yourself that can change the person you are or decide where your going in life. Others can only aid you or try to slow you down but that is all they are able to do. Don’t worry about acceptance and or social status, don’t make life too complicated and be true to yourself. Be who you are and shed the shackles of self-doubt and live for the moment as your true self.





The first step towards happiness is Self Acceptance.

Raymond Barbier