Just some babbling about the self and happiness

014 I often have wondered what is the secret to a happy life and for the most part the answers seemed to change with each situation I experienced during the course of my life. So needles to say the answers I thought were correct were just reflections or shadows of the true secret. The real question is if there is a secret to living a happy life or not. Obviously no one can be happy 100% of the time and I am not even sure that only one secret or answer could be found to the question.  The main thing I have learned is one must let go of the prioritization of the self and its desires. The self is the most time and resource consuming part of being a sentient being. Since the self must exist in order for one to be self aware / sentient then we must learn to restrain its ever present demanding voice.

The tendency for humans to be selfish and self centered is basically a natural part of our psyche and though it can not be totally avoided it can be muffled or muted. Therefore Discipline of the mind is also one of the secrets of a happy life, for without mental discipline the self would become center of all and selfishness would be the main controlling factor in our daily lives. To sustain the self and to take care of its needs is something we must do, but to fulfill its wants and desires is something we can all together control or avoid. The self  usually is like a little child who is spoiled and gets all he or she wants with no restriction. In a disciplined mind the self learns that not all it wants will be fulfilled and that there is higher priorities that must be focused on.

Having concern for the welfare of others seems to be somewhat instinctual to most humans though I have noticed a few people who seem to have no concern for others. This is probably because they allow the self to take high priority to the point of selfishness and become apathetic to the concerns of things that are not of any benefit to themselves. For most of us though the welfare of others usually plays at least a small part in our lives if not a major one. Being social creatures that seem to group up to survive and thrive makes the welfare of others a necessity in maintaining the group.

Maybe a lot of the problem in modern society is that not everyone has a social place, there is a lot of people who are just transient social outcasts. People that are either not accepted by the social circles of modern society or who never could find where they belong. Without purpose socially they seem to either become a social ostrich or turtle by hiding their head in the sand and or retracting into their protective shell. This makes them feel unwanted or unneeded so they float from one social circle to the other having no purpose or destination.

So I guess the secret to happiness is to find your place in society and be needed as well as being satisfied with what blessing you have. To care for others and put the self second to the more important things of life. Maybe there really isn’t no real secret or just one formula to happiness, maybe the secret is to find your own path to walk.

Well enough of my truly random thoughts and babbling


Raymond Barbier

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