Stargate SG-1

Farewell to yet another Sci-Fi Channel show. Seems every time they get a real good show they cancel it. Though I will give them credit for keeping Stargate SG1 on so long. Stargate Atlantis is a good show but until this lame and last season of SG1 it didn’t quite measure up. Is it just me or is SG1’s last season filled with thrown together plot lines? until this episode it quite bored me and wasn’t anyway connected to the the plot line where they left off next season except for maybe 1 or 2 episodes.  Well next week they are having a all week long sg1 marathon, so if you didn’t buy the DVD’s get your VCR’s out or the DVD-R and record away. Next Friday will be the finally so hopefully it will stack up to their usual level. Well if not then not. And yes I really miss Richard Dean Anderson on the show, when he left I knew it would come to an end sooner than later. At least Stargate Atlantis has improved allot so it gives a a little of a consolation prize. Farewell Stargate Sg1 and thanks for the great seasons. ūüôā

Self Forgiveness


  I find it much easier to forgive others of their mistakes than to forgive myself. I do not know if it is due to my belief that I should know better than to make the mistake, or if I am just not as lenient with myself as I am with others.  Self forgiveness is very important in healing ones emotional and mental wounds.

  Forgiving others is also important, but if you can not forgive yourself for the things you have done then you will carry the guilt around forever. One thing to realize is that you are not perfect and that you will make mistakes in life. Sometimes the mistakes are small and sometimes they are life changing.

  Until you forgive yourself of those mistakes you will never be able to move on with your life. By carrying the guilt around all the time you put your body through some heavy stress. We all know how stress can effect ones health and mental state. To forgive is divine is the phrase I remember from my youth. They forgot to tell you the forgiveness is not only for others but also for yourself.

“To forgive is Divine, To forgive ones self is hard.”

Thoughts About Depression


  Depression is one of the great enemies of life. Of course it is a natural process in dealing with grief. But it is only supposed to be a short lived release of sadness. In this day and time depression has put a death grip on a large part of the populous. Depression does not only cause a type of mental and emotional paralysis it also can cause many health issues such as weakening of the  immune system and constant pain in the body.

 There are pharmaceutical solutions to depression but in treating the symptoms they seem to miss the cause sometimes. Those who have depression due to chemical imbalances the drug therapy is a viable solution. Some people are depressed due to events that happened in their life, sometimes events they don’t even remember. Drugs may numb them of the symptoms to a degree but it doesn’t fix the problem.

 Therapist can help some who face depression and that is only if the person who is depressed is ready and or willing to face the problems within. Some people are depressed and do not even know it. For years I have been suffering on and off from depression and until the last 5 years I didn’t even know that I was. Problem with depression is that it manifests itself in many different forms. Even Psychologist miss the signs of depression and even diagnose depression as other mental illnesses.

 Now days a lot of research has gone into how diet and environment effects the mental and physical well being of mankind. So here is another possibility in the ever growing list of things that may cause depression. Maybe one day we will find a quick fix for depression, but till then I guess we have to keep delving into our past to seek out what event that may have triggered the depression. If you are lucky enough to find the event/Chain of events that started the depression just remember forgiveness is divine and is a path to healing.

The Puzzle I Call Life


  Every day within me a war is waged between the side of light and the side of darkness. The outcome is different each day, one will loose one part and gain another. Pretty much a stalemate but one day one side will get the upper hand on the other. My greatest fear is that darkness will win in this war for my mind and soul. Even though I fear such, I have faith in the light side within me.

  My nature is pretty much of the light, though I do suffer from the darkness. Been through pridefulness and still battling against lust. Self pity still rears its head from time to time. Being just a fool in the quest for wisdom I do the best I can. Praying to God and Jesus gives me hope and strength to make it through yet another day. The wisdom they gave me helps me understand yet another piece of the puzzle I call life.

My life is nothing but another journey of a layman and fool who seeks wisdom and peace.

Love Even Harder Than you Work

  Sometimes we get lost in our busy lives we live. We seem to forget the things that make life worth while.
Little things like a smile on someone we love or a simple hug from a friend. We start working our lives away to make things better for ourselves and the ones we love, but then we get trapped in the cycle and forget about the reason why we started working so hard in the first place. All the money in the world can not make someone love you. Yes it
can get you someone who you think loves you, but that person will love your money not you. The people you love and
who love you are there for you through thick and thin, rich and poor and will love you unconditionally. If not then their
love may be shallow and conditional. I am not going to try and say what love is, it is one of those age old questions that have a ever changing definition.

  Work hard to make life a better thing for you and those you love. Love even harder than you work so life will  be better for those you love. Life here on earth is not forever so we need to live life with all the love and understanding we can muster. See each day as a new beginning and another chance to make those we love happy.
Forgive not only the mistakes of others, also forgive the mistakes you have made and learn from those mistakes.
Always remember that the love we give and receive is a far greater treasure than gold or silver.

The tiger or the dove


 Deep within me there seems to be a tiger sleeping.
The persona of a peaceful dove is one I be keeping.
My mind cries out in anger as my heart tempers the words
I speak. There are times that my heart begins to waver and it
is weak. The Tiger Comes out to devour all who oppose it until
the heart regains control.
Then I live with the guilt and it is slowly taking it’s¬†toll.

 The tiger is strong but my will to be a good man is stronger.
I know Soon the tiger must not  be within me any longer.
For only one can be within me, either the tiger or the dove.
So in the end I choose not anger but choose unconditional love.

  Can I defeat the tiger within me or will it devour me?
Will love tame the beast or will the beast be set free?
Either way it will be what I decide for I am the master of my fate.
And I will not give into the age old lie of that it may be to late.

Perception of time

  One can not change their past, They only can learn from it and try to change what might come.We live in
the present and look forward to the future. What we do now will ultimately effect what will come. what I
just said being common sense and basic action causes reaction it seems to be one of the easiest things to
forget. It is easier to look back and see ones mistakes than to think before one acts to avoid future mistakes.
It seems to all boil down to a form of self discipline and most of us are lacking in that area.

 Some of the problem is the world we live in today, everything is going so fast nobody seems to have time to
think. Though time is constant the perception of it is not. Do you remember when we were in school and the
days would creep by during the week but the weekend would fly so fast it seemed to only be one day? Well
that is what I am getting at. Time is time , but how fast or slow we move in it is a perception of time. If we
could master the perception of time then maybe we would feel like we have more time to get things done.
Thus maybe we would think a bit more before we act and avoid allot of the mistakes we will make.

“Live now, Remember the past and plan for the future.”

Blame, Anger & Forgiveness

There are moments in ones life that we throw blame on others for the pain we suffer within. We seem to overlook the fact that we ourselves are a part of the problem. When someone hurts your feelings they have somehow attacked a part of your self identity. Either a side of yourself you that you have pride in or a side you don’t like. The anger we feel towards the person that hurt us is not always created by their actions, sometimes it is created by our own insecurity surrounding the situation.¬†Are really mad at the person or¬†are we mad at ourselves for¬†allowing the situation to¬†become what it has?¬†Well the answer could be one or both. In my experience I have noticed allot of the times I am more mad at myself for either getting myself into the situation or my lack of ability in solving the problem.

 One of my biggest flaws is that I find it easy to forgive others but once I face the fact that I am a part of the problem I can not seem to forgive myself. To forgive others may be divine but to forgive ones self is just necessary for survival. What helps me allot in dealing with the tests and trials of life is to remember that everyone is very much alike in the fact we all have feelings.

”¬†To learn from ones past is wise, To live in ones past is not.”

One Lifetime

We all are granted the precious gift of life. One life on the one planet known to support life. And in this lifetime we have a chance to find peace and love within ourselves and in the world around us. Even if you believe in reincarnation you still have only one chance for love and peace within this lifetime. Why put off finding the two things that make life wonderful until your next life if you have a chance to find it in this one. There are so many teachers, philosophers and sages that we can follow towards these keys of life but in the end you are your own greatest teacher. And one way that may work for one may not work for another due to we are all different in many ways.
  Richard Bach and Dan Millman are two sages I respect and I have adopted many of their philosophies and beliefs, but still I have my own philosophies and I am learning my own way as I travel the path of life. On the matter of religions I am Christian but I respect and learn from the numerous religions, philosophies and beliefs. I will not say one religion is better from the other due to the fact I have no right to choose the beliefs of others. I only have the right to choose my beliefs and to choose my path in life. Regardless of which religion you choose the wisdom within their teachings are still wisdom and the diversity of the human race and their cultures make us who we are. 

R. Barbier¬†–¬†

Burdens of the past

 We all may live in the present, but we are influenced by the past. Decisions we made and people we knew both weighs heavy on our hearts. Mistakes we have learned from still leave scars in our souls and loves that have died still echo in our hearts. They all are there to remind us not to repeat the mistakes of our past. Sometimes it feels as if they remain only to punish us for our mistakes, that will fade as one learns to forgive themselves. 

¬†For me it is far easier to forgive others than to forgive myself. Eventually I do forgive myself for the mistakes I have made, if I didn’t I would¬†not only be punishing myself but others around me for the mistakes I made and that isn’t fair. Not a easy task to forgive oneself but not impossible. Just remember you are not the only one who has made mistakes and that you are only human.¬†

Listen to the heart God blessed you with and not the mind that the world helped program.

Payal Dutta

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