if there is no trust then love gets twisted


002Love and matters of the heart are complicated but yet simple. The complication comes from our doubts and fear of being hurt most of the time.  Sometimes this comes from past experiences and other times it comes from the lack of experience in being truly loved. Also self-worth and doubt can be a big problem as well, but trust plays one of the biggest parts in love and happiness. One can not love someone and be loved and not trust, if there is no trust then love gets twisted into jealousy and possessiveness.

One problem is when someone trusts and loves another with all their heart and are betrayed they tend to get a very deep scar emotionally and mentally. This scar or wound is not easily healed and will tend to affect future relationships as well as any kind of reconciliation in the current relationship. Trust is not easily rebuilt after a betrayal of the heart.

Forgiveness is a key to healing, but it is not always easy to forgive when you’ve been emotionally devastated by the actions of someone you’ve loved and trusted.  We must realize though they betrayed us, they are only human and thus being are prone to be imperfect in action and thoughts. No relationship is perfect either, when you have two people who have been raised differently and had different life experiences trying to become a single  unit there is bound to be times of turbulence during the adjustment period of a newer relationship. Usually in time most differences are either remedied or put aside for the sake of the relationship.

Remember to not judge your partner too harshly, for you have faults just like they do. Compassion, understanding and forgiveness should always play a part in a relationship. Trust is the most important I believe and so is respect, respect for yourself and for your partner. No relationship is beyond repair, but there are some relationships that because of the hurt feelings , verbal and physical abuse that may be better off just letting go of and ending it than trying to save it.

Love is a very precious thing and so is the trust required to have a relationship. Think wisely before entering a relationship and work diligently to maintain and improve it. It takes some work and sometimes a long time to have a great relationship and other times you luck out and find a partner that’s like a soul mate. even those soul mate type relationships require maintenance and work to keep them going.

Life is a long journey that seems to be quickly traveled, so remember to love wholeheartedly, forgive easily and look for the silver lining in every moment you experience.

Ray Barbier

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